Comments on: Twenty Something Advice: Don’t Let Love Swallow Your Independence, Spend Time Learning What You Are Like When You Are Single

By: Jaclyn

Jaclyn — Fri, 04 Jan 2008 19:03:32 +0000

Great post – there’s a similar topic being blogged about over at Thirtysomething Bloggers, fyi: Sarah T. got an email at work listing the ‘top five turn-offs’ for guys and added her own two cents.

http://thirtysomething.ning.com/profiles/blog/show?id=1354858%3ABlogPost%3A861

Feel better!

By: Katelyn

Katelyn — Wed, 02 Jan 2008 20:38:57 +0000

I myself am in a 3 year relationship. I am confident that he is the “one” but after the first year or so of the relationship, I felt I was losing myself a bit. It just so happened that I was offered a great internship in a city 8 hours away. I decided to take it, and have since taken a FT job in that same city. The long-distance works because we are so confident and trusting of each other, and we know it is only until he finishes his degree. But this distance has allowed me to grow as an individual. Sure, he is only a phone call away and still my best friend, but when it comes to making things happen for me, I have only myself to rely on. I have made new friends, joined new organizations, and spent my alone time learning as much as I can about myself. In a way, I’ve gotten the best of both worlds. I am happier and more confident in who I am, and I know that it will help us both in the long run.

I really enjoyed this post!

By: Nathan Snell

Nathan Snell — Fri, 28 Dec 2007 07:50:38 +0000

Your comment at the end rings most true for me, it’s important to keep your independence when in a relationship as well as learn it while out of a relationship. While there should be compromise, I’ve fallen victim in the past of thinking that by keeping elements of my independence (I have to have time to create things/be creative or I’ll go mad) I was doing something wrong. It’s simply not true.

Good guest post

@Tanja – 2.5 kids? What does that entail?

By: Tanja

Tanja — Thu, 27 Dec 2007 20:13:58 +0000

I agree with the advice of enjoy being single, figure out who you are and also don’t lose your independence when you’re in a relationship. Yet at the same time, with out sounding cynical and bitter…..I think everyone should keep an open mind as to what a “happy ending” should be. Besides, there is no such thing as a happy ending, it would be a happy beginning )…and it’s not necessarily written in the cards for everyone to get married and have 2.5 kids with a minivan and a dog and cat,and that’s ok,too.:o)

By: AJ

AJ — Thu, 27 Dec 2007 12:53:30 +0000

I’m with you on this one.

A month away from 26 myself, over recent years I have seen friends marry their long-term partners and although I envy their love and stability that I see on the outside, I can’t help but to imagine and mourn the loss of their own youth – that they will never travel on their own, live on their own, and all the rest of the trials and tribulations of being a single girl.

Myself, I haven’t spent much time IN relationships – over the years I’ve had TWO x 6 month relationships. The last one was almost 3 years ago. I date as much as I can. I feel like I know myself SOOO much better than I did during those times I was with someone – I hid behind them and put my energy into the relationship, rather than my own self and identity.

Nowadays, I still wander around a bit, but I know who I am and I know what I want. I just don’t know WHERE THE HECK HE IS!?